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Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Massive Collapse IPA

Although certain of you strongly disdain my habit of infrequent sports posts, they will continue to dribble out, infrequently. Today's topic is the incredible collapse of the Boston Red Sox--home team of all Portland bloggers, the heart of baseball, personification of all that is true and good. As I write this, they are leading 3-2 over the woeful Orioles while the devil Rays (not Devil Rays, mind you) trail 7-0 to New York. If those trends hold out, all is saved. If they reverse, all is lost. And if both the Rays and Sox win or lose, they go to a tiebreaker (with more potential for all losing or all saving.) What's the story? History:

According to the Elias Sports Bureau, no team has ever missed the playoffs after holding a lead of eight games or more in September. The Red Sox could be the first -- with a game to spare.

At 83-52, the Red Sox entered September with the best record in the American League. They had a 1½ -game edge over the New York Yankees in the AL East and a nine-game lead over the Tampa Bay Rays for the wild card. gave Boston a 99.4 percent chance at the postseason when the month began.

It is by any measure it is one of the most spectacular collapses in sports history, and I don't think any Sox fan is surprised. Every year they anticipate this kind of thing and now that it has come, it simultaneously leaves us aghast and comforted. Those two teams who won the World Series. Not typical. This? Typical.

I'm considering a Massive Collapse IPA to celebrate. 297 BUs of pure bitterness. If they make the playoffs, I may knock it back to 203. I will go back to the cringing.

Postscript: And there it is. Paps blew the save in the 9th, a toxic cherry on top of a toxic season. Rays go to the playoffs, Sox go in the history book.


  1. But on a positive note, the Twins win 1-0 on a Carl Pavano complete game, preventing them from losing 100 games this year. So, Red Sox fan, you can bemoan the team's collapse, and rightly so. But look at the Twins and Twins fans to see what a real first-to-worst collapse looks like.

  2. Amen Leftfielder. It was the 'stache. Also: forget the Red Sox...

  3. "home team of all Portland bloggers, the heart of baseball, personification of all that is true and good."

    The Red Sox are the same team as the Yankees now, huh?

  4. I'm pretty sure you're just gonna have to start believing in fate. Last nights timeline of events was ridiculous. Tell Scutero to run faster. Dan Johnson two strike two out homer? Whaaat? That being said, I can't feel to bad for ya. Boston teams are always in contention and usually send one or two teams to the playoffs every year. Try being a Blazers, Mariners, TAVARIS JACKSON!?!?!! fan.

    I feel your pain so I'll try and help find you your best sorrows juice for the week. Jeff out.
    The guidelines are the same: The Whiskey need to be great examples to illustrate the style (and delicious), and at least some of the whiskeys have to be available in every region of the country. Finally, they should be regular, established whiskeys that will still be in production when the Soxs bounce back next year.
    There are so many good ones out there that it's hard to narrow them down.

    I'll go ahead and throw Pendleton on the list.

  5. Why are you talking about baseball during Football season? :-)

  6. Pretty sad for the Dead Sox. Then they fire Francona. Okay, I guess somebody has to take the blame for an epic collapse. And now, you just have to hope someone beats the crap out of the Yankees.