If I wanted water, I would have asked for water.


Monday, April 01, 2013

Pope Francis to Trappists: No More Beer

I don't follow the papacy too closely, but it's been a high-profile two weeks for the new pontiff, from his casual manner to washing the feet of Muslim girls.  But now he's gone too far.
In his first message to monastic communities across Europe, Francis urged a "less mercantile" approach to financial independence.  He praised Benedictine and Trappist monasteries for their welcoming, engaged approach to surrounding communities, but warned that the Catholic Church should not get too involved in "retail" enterprises.  Many non-profits, he pointed out, raise funds easily enough without resorting to cheese and jelly sales.

Francis also singled out the handful of Trappist monasteries producing beer in Europe, adding that anything that "interfered with clear devotion" was not a proper function for Church brothers.  Church traditionalists, already in turmoil over early actions by the new pope, were left reeling by the news.  
You think Westvleteren is expensive now?  Wait until they they quit making it.  The black market will be huge.

14 comments:

openid said...

Says the man who wears ruby Prada slippers and lives in the richest place in the world....

Jeff Kupko said...

Francis rejected the ruby slippers. He's pretty modest.

jimlin said...

he wants to impress me he can go after all the pedophiles in their ranks. Monks brewing beer is the LEAST of their worries.

Jeff Alworth said...

Before we get too far down the road of Pope-bashing, I direct your attention both to the article's link or, failing that, the date.

Andrew said...

Had me there for a second, good one!

openid said...

LOL. Well done, sir! Hook, line and sinker.

Morgan said...

bloody papists.

Pete Dunlop said...

Haha. Fools galore. For your next post: Does the Pope still shit in the woods?

GardemyBiere said...

Well done sir.

Christopher Grzan said...

"You think Westvleteren is expensive now? Wait until they they quit making it. The black market will be huge."

So good.

Christopher Grzan said...

This might have even been better than last year's "Pale Porter" bit.

Jeff Alworth said...

Christopher and all--thanks for the kind words. This thing spent the day getting Reddit love and I got about ten day's worth of traffic from it. Sweet!

Pamela Snyder said...

I was really scared for a minute there... Well done (even though I saw it a day too late).

Anonymous said...

Even if this did happen, I'm fine with it. Most trappist beers are heavily overrated, IMO. The craziness surrounding Westy's release this year was just over the top. I love me some trappist beers, but they're not THAT good, for popessake...

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